Grief

I tend to think of Amber around Mother's Day. She documented her experience on Insta of watching her Mom slip away and then the aftermath and how she struggled to cope with the loss. Amber's Instagram page was one of the best because it was food photos and pictures with her cats and her husband, but it was also about daily struggles. Sitting in a parked car and feeling drained and unable to even contemplate making the drive to work. Finding small pockets of glee in a lousy day, like a box of Milk Duds. Plus showing off her #signaturethumb because when she'd get a manicure, her thumbs would be two-toned on the diagonal. What impressed me most were the moments where she would share her feelings so boldly. It was like a string that connected us. Amber always seemed to want her audience to know the toughest and realest moments of her life, not merely the happy times at parties and living it up in Chicago. It was refreshing to witness her fearless vulnerability. Her honesty made me feel like I wasn't the only one out there having a difficult time. I took a screenshot of this on April 19th of 2019 and only just came across it while deleting un-necessary photos from my phone. Once again, I'm thinking of Amber today as well as Autumn, Molly, Heather, and Sean, who are dealing with their first Mother's Day without Maureen.