Going Vegan

I've been a vegetarian for almost twenty years and sadly, I have not been the healthiest of such. I can't really cook and so I basically have survived these past two decades on fruit, pizza, chocolate, and Bishop's leftovers, which he always saves for me. I gave up fish about five years back and it just feels like the next step is to go full vegan. I'm hoping it will lead me to greater health and perhaps a new-found interest in my kitchen and its appliances. Most certainly I will feel that I am making a decision which will bring less suffering to my plate, and that for me, is the most important.

I never thought that being a vegetarian would be as hard as it has been. It's not the complete avoidance of eating any food with a pulse, as one might think. The most difficult part of being a vegetarian is the nearly complete lack of support in my decision from all those around me. Of course my closest friends have my back 100%, but I am, more often than not, met with a great deal of criticism. I would like to point out, that while I am extremely particular in what I will and will not eat, that I do not make the carnivores in my life feel like monsters for the choices they make. I have been told, to name a few, that I am both crazy and stupid for being a vegetarian. As if I ever asked for their opinion in the first place. I am especially annoyed when people say, "Well, God put those animals on this earth for us to eat." Usually I wanna respond with, "Oh, yeah? Who's the dumbass now because there is no God and the last time I looked you had the dullest teeth imaginable and I can't see you taking down a fucking steer with your bare hands and gnawing through it's jugular. Idiot." (Also, that "logic" doesn't seem to apply to all animals on Earth. I mean, when was the last time anyone had a lovely plate of Labradoodle?) But, I know that just as there is no way they will convince me that I need to eat meat, I know that they will never see the reasoning behind my own decision.

Over the past twenty years, there's never come a time where I've said, "Oh, man, I could kill for a Philly cheesesteak from Steve's..." but I do know that a day will come when I will think, "I would slaughter small children for a Krispy Kreme donut." But ya know, it's about time that I started leading a healthy life and if that means saying goodbye to Gruyere cheese and butter (oh my god, no more butter!?!?!?), well, I'd rather be happy forever than sated for a moment.

(special shout out to Kat and Marina for their love and complete support of my future vegan self!)