Vision Board from Natalia

When I was helping Natalia move she showed me the vision board she had hanging in her hallway. I remember that on it she had a photo of a couple walking on a beach because in her ideal life she would have a partner who would stroll with her, hand in hand, along a sandy beach. She looked at it every day and voila! She met the man of her dreams and moved from Harlem to Honolulu with the ocean just a few blocks from her home. I told her I need to get a vision board and she immediately said that she'd give me hers because she no longer needed it. Now it hangs under my bed, next to my desk. I mostly posted up pictures from magazines of places I want to visit, qualities I want to cultivate, and sometimes just random things to make me smile, like my Goldie Falafel and shake pins. 

My John Lennon pin and a reminder to be honest and authentic.

The Colonial Theatre marquee, vintage camera, falafel and shake from Goldie, Le Sirenuse Hotel balcony with a white and blue squiggled tile from the beaches of Positano, plus a Lisa Star (Simpson) shrinky dink.

The Cliffs of Moher and a gravel road in the mountains somewhere.

Grote Markt in Antwerpen

Antwerpen-Centraal and a lady with grown-up fashion sense, something I do not currently possess the courage to represent.

Vlaeykensgang

In my dream life I have a lovely home all to myself with no neighbours for at least 100 feet and have a Little Free Library like this one right next to my mailbox.

Escaping in a fantastic vintage (but modernised) baby blue VW Bus!

Having a home with sheep to act as lawn mowers and loads of trees with a hole in them for the owl or squirrelies.

Hoping that I'll always find time for music, on my iPod or jamming to UB40 on an old school radio (which growing up we referred to as a ghetto blaster because it sounded super cool. Not terribly PC but we meant no disrespect, we just wanted to be rad like all the breakdancers we saw tear up the cardboard with that big ass radio blasting some smokin' hot tunes).

Star In Bruges

The first of April 2014 I went with Ashlee to Bruges for the day. Before we went back to the train to go home to Antwerp on our sore and weary feetsies, we stopped in Minnewater Park where Ashlee took a series of what would become my favourite pictures of me in my thirties. I was young-ish, healthy and fit, while traveling and discovering Dublin, London, and Belgium with the person who was at that time my closest friend and confidante. I look at these photos and see a me that was as close to happy as possible and never even realised it. I long to get back to that.

She Ain't Heavy...

Tonight I finished Bryan Batt's memoir, She Ain't Heavy, She's My Mother, and it was so freakin' good! I've had it sitting on my bookshelf for so long but I'm glad I picked it up this month. It was a great escape from the oodles of stress that keeps coming at me in tsunami sized waves. I'd light a cigarette, crack open the book and be transported to New Orleans or Manhattan or Los Angeles and for those brief moments I felt calm and utterly absorbed in his storytelling. 

Favorites

In one of my journals from college I wrote a list of my favorites on September 10th, 1997:

cereal - Cocoa Pebbles

fashion designer - Isaac Mizrahi

thing to sleep in - my Swedish Ikea bed

accessory - my 3 rings - Claddagh, emerald heart, and silver band

perfume - Summer/Spring - Rapture • Winter/Fall - China Musk

underwear - Contempo's 1994 line

book - "5 Children and It" by E. Nesbit

movie - The Blues Brothers

movie star - Gary Oldman

author - E.B. White

thing to do - daydream

title of film if G.O. and I starred - "Partners in Crime"

song - "Lisa Says" (live version) by The Velvet Underground

album - The Smiths "The Queen Is Dead"

singer - Madonna

indulgence - Russell Stover's chocolates

snack - muffins

fast food - French Fries

TV Show - (now) Seinfeld - (then) MASH

gift to give - music

gift to receive - love

place to visit - home (Philadelphia)

teacher - Mrs. McCormick

time of day - before I fall to sleep

historical figure - Ponce de Leon

memory - dropping Dave O'Donnell off from work

hot drink - hot chocolate

cold drink - H2O & Mango Madness Snapple

dream - Sid & I

day of the week - Thursday

meal - pasta, sauce, garlic bread (Olive Pit), H2O and wine

quote - "When you look for the bad in mankind expecting to find it, you surely will." - Abraham Lincoln {later discovered he did NOT say this}

17 February 2013

Spent the entire day with my beloved Bishop. Stopped at Mum's to discover my Jaffa Cakes had arrived! As delicious as I'd hoped! Got Bish at noon - chatted for a bit with Daddy Pax. Off to The Colonial Theatre in Phoenixville to see the 2pm 35mm "North By Northwest" (Stop! (puts on glasses) ...stop...) - so brilliant! Great conversation and so many laughs all day! Went to Bombay Local for yummy pizza (saw handsome bearded fella!) then to Wegman's and finally to Cedar for the brutal season finale of Downton Abbey. Can they have really killed off Matthew? It's like Dallas when Bobby "died". Utter madness. I heart Bishop!

We Heart Chris Meloni

I know, I know, another bleedin' post featuring text messages. But I don't give a rat's.

Sexiest Man Texts

For years Amy has been waiting for People to name Tom Hiddleston as their Sexiest Man Alive. Every year that she's let down she texts me to fill me in on who they've claimed is the most recent sexiest man. I am a gal with a great many opinions and can be very cutting and snarky. It's all to make her laugh and cheer her out of her disappointment.

The Thomas Kinkade Room

Once the kids were moved out of the house, Rose re-did all the bedrooms and mine became known as The Kinkade Room (due to the chair-rail border that features Thomas Kinkade's artwork). It looks like a room at a cozy bed and breakfast. A far cry from the one I once knew, with walls covered in posters and crowded with Ikea furniture with clothes and books strewn everywhere.

Wallander Again

I'm re-watching Wallander on Tubi (gotta love a free streaming channel!!) and it's still so good. The bonus is that I've forgotten nearly everything that happened on the series in the years since I first saw it. I remembered messaging Amy about seeing Tom Hiddleston in it and dug up the old texts from November 3rd, 2017.

Sunnie Press Summer Bucket List

While still available, I recommend heading over to Sunnie Press and ordering one of their super-rad Summer Bucket Lists for the season. Lucy loves hers!

Stef and RJ

Their brilliant series, Hart to Hart, is a sure-fire way to lower my anxiety and keep me calm. There’s so many laughs and loads of sweet romance that I never get tired of seeing it. When life gets particularly rough and I feel like nothing will ever turn out right for me and I just want to throw in the towel altogether, it's such a comfort to watch and re-watch these two marvelous humans. Aside from their work on Hart to Hart, I genuinely love these kids. Each wrote fantastic memoirs and have done so much with the lives they were given. They are wonderful imaginary friends to have.

(I know the above photo is kinda grainy but I love it.)

Bella And Jacob

Here are two simply stunning photos from Isabella and Jacob's wedding last month. I can't wait to get to know Jacob better and be a witness to what is sure to be some big, fat, lifelong adoration and joy!

FaceTiming with Lucy in Indy

It was so nice to look at my phone and see an incoming FaceTime call from little Miss Lucy, two days in a row. She's visiting her maternal grandparents out in Indiana and yesterday I snapped a pic of her when she wasn't looking. Today she caught me doing the same thing and said "take a picture of me with my Husky!"

Noely

Mercury is my latest find in the realm of new music. Noely is a lovely gal I met at LesbiVeggies last Saturday and today I saw her again with Marina. She's very sweet and super talented. Her track Back N Forth is phenomenal. 

Good To See You

What's a girl to do who is in immense debt but trying to crawl out of it only to have to drop over six grand into her vehicle when the engine dies four hours from Jersey, and when finally reaching home makes a solemn vow to behave and not splurge on any big purchases until them bills get paid, only to receive an email stating that her favourite author will be at her favourite theatre during her favourite season and they are offering a meet and greet package? She throws that caution into the proverbial wind and drops three hundred and thirty bucks on two tickets in the fourth row for herself and her favourite baby brother. Honestly, I'd be a fool to not go. The best was calling Marina and sharing my joyous news because she always gives the perfect reaction. It was a stunned silence, light gasp, and then her "are you serious?!" Hell yeah, I am.

Bathroom Advice

Living

I'm re-watching this film and falling in love with it once again. I first saw it February 5th at The Colonial Theatre and was blown away but just how absolutely gorgeous it looked. Aside from that, it was a wonderful story with top-notch acting across the board. I was one of only five people in the little downstairs theatre - an older couple and a younger couple plus me. When the credits came to an end the older couple a few rows in front of me stood to leave. The gent turned to the three young 'uns and said "We've got a lot of work to do!" The young man added, "Gotta make more playgrounds!" and I said "Time to get out there and live!" A truly inspiring film.

(photo kidnapped from youtube)

What I Love About Kay

• She is one of the few people in my life that actually reads this blog.
• Keeps in touch with me - it's not always me that's reaching out to her.

• Since childhood, she has always asked how I am. This is something most children and young people never think to ask of the grown-ups in their lives. They naturally assume that if you are an adult then you must have your life together. Kay intuited that I was a friend, not just an old spinster auntie, and treated me as an equal. It was beyond refreshing to be around her. Still is.

• She is always game for an adventure and a mini-road trip.

• Is twenty three and since high school has had the drive, determination, and work ethic of a Depression-era father of four.

• Loves Johnny Mathis just like me.

• We have the same taste in food, mostly pizza and falafels plus coconut!

• Her kindness is second to none. 

• Knowing that in the last weeks of MomMom's life it was Kayla who bathed her and cared for her. 

• She knows me so well, as is evident in her answers to the Ask Someone list of questions I asked her in December 2022.

• Her iron will. There is nothing she can't handle. I know inwardly she struggles but on the outside one would think she were Atlas, bearing the weight of the world. She was studying to be an EMT/paramedic before looking to apply to the Fire Academy and none of the horrors that she might encounter (such as de-gloving) turned her off or rattled her resolve. If I am ever in a medical emergency, Kayla is the one I would call. 

• Has interesting interests. A lot of people in their twenties seem to just go with whatever and not really be into art or music, books, history, or anything other than what is in the moment. Kayla is into a little bit of everything. But gaming and Manga are at the top of her Hit Parade.

• She is effortlessly beautiful.

• Loves Gavin de Becker and The Gift of Fear. I gave a copy of the book to her and Isabella when they were 16 and 17 respectively and I am so grateful that they both read it and took it all in. Kay read about the ways that men try to control and manipulate women and it made her think of her first relationship. She recognised that characteristic in her former partner and since then has been able to actively seek (and find) someone who shows her respect and kindness and is deserving of her love, attention, and time. This is hugely impressive. To see the mistake you made in a relationship at such a young age and stop it from happening again is frankly, amazing.

• People have come and gone in my life, but since she was twelve years old, Kayla and I have been true friends and it has only deepened over the years. I hope to spend the rest of eternity with her because she is without question, one of my dearest friends and someone I can depend on no matter what.