Dennis Miller is the man that saved my life, changed it in every respect and is solely responsible for my current state. I first noticed him years ago when I saw his stand up, Black and White. Several years following that I got a copy of his Off White Album which damn near killed me when I could not catch my breath in between hysterical fits of laughter. Terri and I literally had to pull over while driving on 95 in Virginia in order to compose ourselves. The man makes me laugh like no other. Then about six years ago, I decided to re-watch his HBO stand-ups and write down all the names he dropped and then research them. I already knew about half of his references, but there were still tons more to learn. One of whom was James Stockdale. Dennis Miller's rant about James Stockdale clung to my thoughts for days. I bought one of Stockdale's books (Courage Under Fire) and learned the name Epictetus. I then went out and bought The Enchiridion. I was most struck by the statement that dealt with what is within one's control and what is outside of one's control. My acceptance of this has been paramount in reshaping my thought pattern entirely.
Since I was nine years old, I hardly remember a day that went by when thoughts of hopelessness and suicide weren't in the forefront of my every thought. At times it became overwhelming and I truly believed that I would remain in this darkness for all time. Reading about the profound effect that Epictetus' teachings had on James Stockdale shook me from my den of despair and made me realise that I was the one in complete control of my thoughts and my actions. I possess free will and I control my reaction to the things that occur in my life. There is so much that is absent in my life and even more that seems wrong and unfixable; regardless, I have come to focus on what I can control and I no longer feel a constant weight of the burden of what should have been and what I don't have in my life. I don't freak out if I'm stuck in traffic and am going to be late to work at my new jobbie. I can't control the traffic-if I'm late, I'm late. I can control my emotions and reminding myself of the teachings of Epictetus on a daily basis has alleviated nearly all stress and depression from my life. I no longer feel cloaked in a feeling of helpless hopelessness and I no longer feel that my only option is to obtain a gun permit and order that Beretta 92. So thank you Dennis Miller, you handsome devil. You have impacted my life in a way I'm sure you never imagined. In short, you freakin' rock.
2 comments:
I wish I felt that way. I should get out my copy of the Off White Album, I think. But in the meantime....so you'd recommend the Beretta 92???
absolutely, it's beautifully crafted and will do the trick in a single shot. Trust me, i've done the research! but i recommend listening to The Off White Album first...it may save you the cost of the beretta!
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